Shortly after I started this blog, my sister convinced me to sign up for a half marathon. “Do it for the blog!” she said. I’ve never run a race before. I run sporadically. (Side note: I can’t use that word without thinking of Clueless!) So this definitely counts as routine maintenance. Though to get ready for said race, I have to make running part of my weekly routine. Then obviously I also have to shake up that routine. It’s really tough keeping up with the rules of this blog!
Anyway…I decided to shake up my run by not taking my headphones with me yesterday. No playlist. No podcast. Just me and my thoughts. Here’s a little peek at where my mind went:
Mindy Kaling’s running fantasies. In this truly spectacular book Mindy discusses how the only reason she doesn’t weigh ten thousand pounds is because she dreams up “long and vivid revenge fantasies” while she works out. Things like: My husband is murdered in Central Park on an idyllic spring day OR I get that woman who was rude to me at Saks in trouble. Her descriptions of these scenarios are amazing. If you haven’t read it yet, you MUST pick up this book:
Even when I do have a playlist in my ears, I tend to include at least one running fantasy in my workout. Knowing I didn’t have music or a podcast to distract me, I decided I had to start my run with one of my favorites: I am married to Prince Harry and in order to be skinny enough to share clothes with my new best friend/sister Kate Middleton, I have to work out all the time. In this fantasy, I also have two bodyguards running in front of and behind me because obviously I am the second most famous/important/sought after woman in the world. (Kate is the first. Duh.)
The moon. It was gorgeous in the morning sky. I sort of wanted to stop and take a photo. But the moon never looks as good in photos. You have to just appreciate it without trying to snapchat it to all your friends. I had a lot of thoughts about how that is a good life lesson for today’s social media obsessed world. And also that for the sake of the blog, I should take a photo. And then back to thinking about how the photo wouldn’t actually look as good as the moon did in person…it was a vicious cycle of thoughts.
That episode of Friends when Phoebe and Rachel are running in the park. This is another one I think about semi-frequently on runs, but it was especially pronounced on this one. Probably because without headphones in, I could hear my breathing. And it was definitely more of a controlled Rachel Green pattern of breaths and less of a flailing, fun I’m out of breath and loving it Phoebe Buffay kind of running. I don’t think I can do the Phoebe-running. Though I suppose that is a way to shake up my routine on a future run….
Is that the same orange shirt guy that I used to pace myself on Tuesday? After much internal debate, I decided that orange shirt guy was not the same. Because a) he probably owns more than one shirt and unless he’s one of those ridiculously lucky (and fictional?) New Yorkers who has a washer/dryer in his apartment, he’s probably not wearing the same workout shirt on Tuesday and Thursday. And b) I totally flew by him and Tuesday’s orange shirt guy ran at the perfect pace for me to just follow him like a pony following a carrot.
Who Run the World? When I run to a playlist, my iPhone’s shuffle function is really good at popping either Beyoncé or the cast of Pitch Perfect into my ears to ask me “Who run the world?” right when I’m 94% sure I will die if I run another ten feet. So when I was really struggling on my last half mile, I sang it in my head. Though truly, most days my answer to that question is “Not me. But I can probably make it to the end of this lap around the reservoir.”
I know there were other thoughts…about blisters on my feet, and a tightness in my hip, and an emergency phone covered in stickers that I have never noticed on the path before. But the rest get pretty boring from here. So I’ll just leave you with the really awesome view that makes getting to the the park before 7am so much easier: